Wife, is desiring your husband a curse? (Genesis 3:16)

"Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee." -Genesis 3:16

In chapter 3 of Genesis we read of the fall of mankind after eating of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, casting all the world into the darkness of sin. From verses 14 through 19, God details the curses due to the fallen state, first addressing the serpent, then to Eve (and all women) and then to Adam (and all men). While addressing Eve, in the midst of the curses of painful childbirth and how she will be under her husband's authority, God says "and thy desire shall be to thy husband". So, is a woman's desire for her husband a curse?

We have all heard it preached how a wife should have desire for her husband (and no other man), and that is a good thing, but is this verse really talking about a wife wanting her husband? Given it is sandwiched in among verses of curse, there is a more likely explanation. After all, if a wife has desire for her husband, why must he rule over her?

The literal translation of this piece of scripture is "to your husband your desire". Additional words are added in an attempt to provide clairity to the wording but the literal passage is vague. Many translations render it similar to the King James wording above, but others are similar to the following:

"Your desire shall be contrary to your husband" -ESV

"And you will desire to control your husband" - NLT

That is quite a difference, "contrary" as opposed to "desire shall be to" or even "desire to control", wow! It has been said by many women how they want to change their man but let's not digress. Could these renderings be closer to the intended meaning?

While Adam and Eve enjoyed perfect harmony with the environment around them and with each other while in the Garden of Eden, scripture is clear that after the fall they and all mankind would have to endure constant struggle and conflict. All the curses God put forth reflect this. God will detail in other passages what His perfect will is for the family relationship hierarchy so I will not detail that here. But it is this writer's contention that the curse of Genesis 3:16 is not desire as we tend to think of it, but rather the power struggle men and women have with authority over the family. That her desire is not for her husband but for his position. So her desires would be better understood as "contrary" to her husband. Does she desire to control him? Well, I'll let the reader ponder that one.